Archive for Goal Setting
Mission Statements for Different Roles
Posted by: | Comments
Here’s a different concept but one that makes great sense to me.
It’s from Stephen Covey’s “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”.
We’ve talked about establishing goals but we never divided up the different parts of our life with mission statements. This might help us with establishing priorities in goals as well as realizing what we are ignoring that we shouldn’t ignore. It also will point out areas that we need to address with more gratitude. It will help you figure out where there is and isn’t balance in your life.
For instance, maybe you’re a boss, a mother, a girlfriend to other women, a church member, a volunteer, a club member, a PTA member, part of your Home Owners Association, a mentor, etc.
List each part of your life as a role.
Write out a mission statement for each of your roles. What are your responsibilities and desires for each of these roles. Be specific (in everything we do, you have to be specific). Then go ahead and see how well you’re “making it” in each role. If you’re not achieving or reaching what you expect, then what can you do about it. For example, right now my life is focused on this computer project at work. We have about 3 weeks to go but then there’s training after it. It’s consuming most of my life. It’s out of balance. What is losing time and attention is my fitness and my dog. However, now that I am back from two weeks in Colorado I am refocusing my life on my dog and the role I have set out for my life with her. This is very basic but hopefully it will give you an idea.
Terrie
Examine Your Fears – Find More Limiting Beliefs
Posted by: | Comments
Another reason we don’t get far in achieving our successes is our fears. Often we are too afraid even to examine our fears.
Refusal to do that however, is a sure way to remain stuck in the same rut we’re in.
But to tell you to examine your fears is one thing. To actually do it is another. Often it’s difficult to do this because it involves being able to know what that success is like. Here’s where your visualization and imagination come into play. Remember that visualization is a vital element in creating your Success List. You have to be able to see yourself with that success in your “hands” so to speak. It has to become yours in your mind before it can become yours in the external world. So part of your job in visualizing this success is to see how your life will change and what will be required of you when you hold that success for real.
Let’s take a few examples:
- Weight loss or getting into shape.
What happens when you lose weight? Well, you get lots of compliments and people pay attention to you. Can you handle all that? Are you good at taking compliments? Do you just prefer to fade into the wallpaper? You’ve probably heard that one reason women gain weight is that they’ve been a victim of some sort of abuse in the past and this is their way of protecting themselves from abuse – they try to make themselves unattractive. So what will happen when they take the weight off?
You’ll have to alter your outfits so that will involve shopping and money. Do you have the money and the desire to get new clothes? Will that involve doing something you’ve never done before? Maybe you don’t have alot of money or your spouse doesn’t want you to spend money on clothes or you feel guilty. Or worse yet, you don’t want to get new clothes because you’re afraid that you’ll gain the weight back. This applies to your having to get rid of your old clothes too. There’s that fear of letting go.
These are all underlying fears and they can all serve to sabotage you if you’re not aware and don’t do the clearing (denials) needed to lay the groundwork for a new you.
- Prosperity
You’ve all heard that a great proportion of people who win the lottery are broke again in a few years (or less). If you’re going to be prosperous, you have to know more – know how to handle money, how to save, invest, properly pay off bills etc. You also have to have the proper demeanor when you are prosperous. You need to wear the right clothes, go to the right places, behave in the right manner, etc. Are you prepared to change? Do you want to change? Do you want to learn the new things you have to learn? If you’re afraid of money because you’ve already had problems with it before, then you’ll shy away from achieving what you really deserve. If you’ve been told that you’re no good with money, you’ll have that belief that has to be changed to.
Maybe you think that all prosperous people are snobs or greedy or something negative and you don’t want to be like that. That’s certainly a fear and/or limiting belief.
- Improved relationships
This is a big one. If you’re looking for a significant other, there are many changes you have to make. Are you happy living with someone or are you someone who prefers to live alone? Do you have enough closet space for another person or are your closets all full of your stuff? If so, the Universe doesn’t believe you have any real intention of having someone else in your house. What about your garage? Is there enough room for another car? Do you like your freedom and are afraid that you won’t have this freedom once someone else comes into your life – you won’t be able to come and go as you please?
Do you have habits that you might have to change if someone else is in your life? For example, do you get up early to do stuff around the house or to go running? Maybe that new person in your life won’t like that. Are you willing to give that up? Or, are you afraid of having to change all your habits? Do you have animals and are afraid that a new person will not tolerate them? Are you afraid because you don’t know how to cook? Or don’t clean things up like others think you should? Do you have so much stuff that there’s just no room for another person?
There’s so much more to think about that can uncover fears and desires of your own. It’s so important that you look beyond the romantic notion of someone paying attention to you. There’s so many more facets to relationships and you have to anticipate them all and decide if this is really what you want.
Help From Napoleon Hill
Posted by: | Comments
Napoleon Hill talks about “Applied Faith” in his “Keys to Success“. As I was skimming through the chapters I saw this and felt it would be perfect as we continue on our positive path for 2012.
It’s called “Demonstrating The Power of Your Faith” and I’m just going to list the steps he talks about in order to build your faith and your “PMA” (Positive Mental Attitude):
1) Adopt a definite major purpose and begin to attain it. This is what we’ve been working on for the past 5-6 weeks now.
2) Affirm the object of your desire through prayer, morning and night. See yourself already in possession of it. You will achieve precisely the success you can envision for yourself.
3) Associate as many as possible of the ten basic motives with your definite major purpose. Give yourself a compelling motive for doing what you want to do. Bring that motive into your mind frequently through the day. Here are the 10 basic motives toward action:
- Self-preservation
- Love
- Fear
- Sex
- Desire for life after death
- Freedom for mind and body
- Anger
- Hate
- Desire for recognition and self-expression
- Wealth
4) Write out a list of all the advantages of your definite major pupose and bring them into your mind as often as you can. This will make you success-conscious by the power of self-suggestion.
5) Associate with people who are like-minded.
6) Don’t let a day pass without making at least one definite move toward attaining your major purpose. This is what he calls persistent action. It is key to take action. You can’t sit around and think that your denials and affirmations will make your desire come to pass. It just doesn’t work that way.
7) Choose a “pacesetter”. Pick someone prosperous, self-reliant and successful and make up your mind not only to catch up with that person but to pass him or her by. Don’t tell anyone your goal (we’ve told you that many times).
Surround yourself with books, pictures, mottoes and other suggestive devices. Pick things that symbolize and reinforce achievement and self-reliance. Keep adding to your collection, move things around, always making it fresh in your mind. Keep a notebook or diary program around to write down things that inspire you.
9) Never run away from disagreeable circumstances. Fight them with all your resources.
10) Recognize that anything worth having has a definite price tag. The price of self-reliance is eternal vigilance in applying your faith.
Cloe the door of fear behind you and you will quickly see the door of faith open before you.
Write out (or print out) these ten steps and review them daily. Then put them all into practice. Each night you should review this list and see how you are doing with applying your faith!
Terrie
It’s Time to Reassess
Posted by: | Comments
Ok, so it’s the end of January. Now is the time to reassess your “success” list. What has happened in the past month? What have you accomplished?
If you’re well on your way to achieving your successes, great! Maybe you want to revisit the 2012 Success List in order to tweak it or refine it a bit now that you’ve had a month to think about it. But maybe you have uncovered several limiting beliefs this month. If so, use the next week to work with denials to clear them. While you are doing your week’s worth of denials, start working on the wonderful affirmations you want to say AFTER your denials. But don’t say them yet, just start thinking about them. Repeating this process frequently. In fact, I would like you to consider taking the first week of every month to clear more land and start planting new stronger and healthier seeds. This will keep your ground clear and fertile. You’ll also be surprised at what you discover.
So what if this has not been a great month for following your Success List? What if you ‘gave up’ early on? What if nothing’s happened and you’re discouraged? Should you just stop and wait for next New Year’s Day? Heck no! It’s just time to reassess.
Hopefully you haven’t gotten so upset that you threw out the list. Before you take that list out and go over it, I want you to go back to your inventory list – the one we made at the beginning of the process. Start a new page and date it today’s date. Make an inventory of where you were on 31 December and then write down where you are today. Also write out what’s happened to you this month. This will be easier in the future if you record things every day (a great use for the Gratitude Journal). So what’s been going on in your life? I bet you’ll be surprised at the great things that have happened in this short time. Sometimes all it takes is to look at this inventory to realize that things aren’t as bad as you thought they were. Maybe everything didn’t go perfectly but I bet your attitude about them is much different and more positive. That’s a step in the right directions. Remember that you are not what you think but you are what you thought. So this month’s positive thoughts are producing great things in your life – you just may not be able to see them yet.
But what should you do now?
After you’ve made this inventory, you need to make sure that the items on this list are really yours. We talked about that before but maybe you didn’t really know or you thought the success list items were yours but they aren’t. Check your inner feelings again. Is it you who wants to achieve such and such or is it your wife, your parents, your doctor, etc? If it’s not yours, cross it off. None of this “well, it should be mine even if it isn’t”. That won’t work until it really IS yours. I finally quit smoking when I woke up one day and said “enough, I’m ready to stop this” and then it was easy. But all the other times I tried to stop were unsuccessful because I did not OWN them then. Once I made MY decision, then it was easy – even after 26+ years of smoking.
That would be the first place to start. Examine your list and see if these are things YOU really want. Be honest with yourself. It will mean the difference between success and feeling as if you can’t accomplish anything. Ask yourself if you really want this thing. Where did the idea come from? Has it been a long standing desire? Or something that just developed recently. If it’s long standing, it might have its roots in other people’s encouragement.
What’s Being Recorded In Your Subconscious?
Posted by: | Comments
As there is 1 1/2 more weeks left in January 2012, I continue to point out things that might have derailed you from your 2012 Success List. If you make it through January still on track, you’ll have a great chance of accomplishing your “successes”.
Emmet Fox wrote about “The Dictaphone” and I think that’s worth discussing today.
He proposed an imaginary experiment. Suppose that without your knowledge an invisible dictaphone was strapped to your shoulders the first thing tomorrow morning. You carry it with you all day long and every word you said was recorded. Tomorrow the recording was played back so you could hear every single word that you said. If you’re an average human being you’ll probably be a bit embarrassed. Think what would happen if the dictaphone also recorded every THOUGHT you had as well as every word you spoke.
Your subconscious mind absorbs EVERYTHING you think and say. Remember what I like to say “You are what you thought”, not really what you think. It’s what went into your subconscious before now that has molded your being and experience.
I emphasize that you need to monitor all your words – both spoken and thought. This is one of the most common reasons for “failure” in achieving your “Successes”. You set out with great intentions and do the groundwork of denials and affirmations but then go right back to your old ways of thinking and acting – using the same old phrases and thoughts – many of which are downright negative or have negative connotations. That will derail you as surely as quitting your pursuit. That’s why I’m emphasizing the “Words of Wisdom” series of posts. See what phrases we use in life on a daily basis, analyze what they mean and then wipe them from your vocabulary.
There is no way around it. You have to pay attention to what you’re saying and thinking. I suggest you get a small notebook you can carry in your pocket or purse and write down everything you hear and think as it happens. Then each night review this list and note the ones you want to eliminate and also think about the reason you need to do that. This will help you identify other phrases and thoughts you want to get rid of too. Things such as “I’m fed up”, “I’m sick and tired”, “You’re killing me”, “I can’t afford to….” etc.
Work on this for a week and see what changes in your life.
Terrie
In Spite Of
Posted by: | CommentsHere’s a great Emmet Fox post:
Success consists in the overcoming of difficulties. All men and women who have made a success of any kind have done so by overcoming difficulties. Where there are no difficulties to be overcome, anybody can get the thing done, and doing so cannot be called success.
There was a time when laying a telegraph line from New York to Boston presented many complicated changes. Then there was a time when doing that was easy, but laying the Atlantic cable was a great achievement, because of the perplexing areas which had to be overcome. Later on, marine cable laying became a routine business, but radio across the ocean presented problems which for a time seemed insurmountable. Then those difficulties were overcome too.
There are no personal areas that cannot be transformed by quiet, persistent, spiritual treatment, and the appropriate wise activity.
If you have a personal experience that seems to keep you from success, do not accept it as such, but capitalize it and use it as the instrument for your success.
H. G. Wells had to give up a dull underpaid job because of ill health, so he stayed at home and wrote successful books and became a world-known author instead. Edison was stone deaf and decided that this would enable him to concentrate better on his inventions. Beethoven did his work in spite of his deafness.
Theodore Roosevelt was a sickly child and was told he would have to lead a careful retired life. He was a very short-sighted and nervous little boy. Instead of accepting these suggestions, however, he worked hard to develop his body and became, as we know, a strong husky open-air man and big game hunter. Gilbert wrote Pinafore on a sick bed, wracked with severe pain.
The owner of a fashionable dress business in London started with northing but good taste in clothes and a belief in prayer, and is a wealthy and successful woman today.
Whatever you think your disadvantage is, capitalize it. Spiritual treatment and courageous determination can overcome anything.
Emmet Fox
What You Expect
Posted by: | Comments
As we continue with our 2012 Success List I wanted you to read this post on “What you Expect”.
All of our lives we have put in our expectancy that we couldn’t do it ourselves, that somebody outside of us had to help us, had to give it to us. That God sitting on the mountaintop had to help us.
We should be saying, “Wait a minute, God’s stuff outside of us is the energy force, the life force, the divine substance of the universe.” And this divine substance is what responds when we say “OK”. That’s all we have to say. We have to accept the ideas that come in, and we keep saying that I am the will of God in action, versus, I don’t want to do my will, I want to do God’s will.
If we say, “I don’t want to do my will, I want to do God’s will”, then we are separating ourselves from God. And yet Jesus told us, “All things I do, you can do also, and even greater.” The same Christ that was in Jesus is in us. That is the divine substance that we talk about. That is the Christ itself, that is the individualized Christ. The individualization of God in human beings.
Now, when we get that in our mind and we realize that there’s something in this world that is giving us ideas, and every time we brush it aside or say we can’t, or we don’t know how, or we don’t want to do that, or it’s too much, it’s too hard, it’s too whatever, then we push that idea away.
This is what’s so important to teach childern not to ever say, “I can’t” but to always say, “Show me how. Show me the way. Show me what I can do. Show me the next step to take.” Any of these things that open up, give you that expectancy with you keeping your eye on the goal. The expectation that that goal is on its way to you, and pulling it in closer and closer and closer. The ideas that we have are ours to do, to be, to accept. When we allow ourselves that freedom to do that, we take out all of the negative. It’s like a clear tunnel that we can go through with no interferences.
Read More→
Words of Wisdom
Posted by: | Comments
Or not wisdom perhaps. You all know that the one thing we preach over and over again is to watch your words (and phrases). This is so vital now at a time when you’re working on your success list! You can sabotage yourself without even knowing it. You have to be extremely conscientious about what is coming out of your mouth, what is going on inside your skull and even what you are letting in your ears (from others). You have to be the monitor. Learn to say “That is not my truth” whenever you hear, say or think something that is contrary to your desires.
This week’s “words of wisdom” phrase is
“You can’t win ‘em all”.
How often do you hear this phrase? Quite a bit I bet.
What does it tell your subconscious mind?
It tells it that you cannot win everything. Do you want to believe that? Do you believe that? Of course you don’t. You want to win every challenge you’re involved with. You want to win everything. That will make you successful. It’s not greedy. It’s an attitude of wanting to succeed and that’s what we are all about here. So, eliminate that phrase. When you hear it said, simply say “That is not my truth, I can AND DO win them all! I am a success!”
Terrie
The Mirror of Your Mind
Posted by: | Comments
Still working on your Success List? Having problems, perhaps, figuring out what you want to be or what qualities you want to embrace? Take a look at this system and see if it will help you with your planning. January should be a month of preparation. Ideally December should be that month but everyone is so busy with the holidays (although this should be a part of the holidays) that they don’t have time for anything else. So, continue to use January to figure out where you are and where you want to go.
One of the best ways to take a look at the things in your life that you wish to change this to look at others around you. Try this exercise. Write down a list of 3 to 5 people depending on how much time you have that are in your life right now. Next to each name list of qualities that you like about that person, and the qualities that you don’t like about that person. Another way to do this is to list 3 to 5 people that you don’t like that are in your life right now. And on a separate list you can list 3 to 5 other people that are in your life that you do like.
Regardless of how you decide to do it you now have a list of qualities that you can take a look at. How many of these qualities are qualities that you see in yourself ones who really hone in and force yourself to take a deep look at yourself.
People come into your life for a reason. Once you identify the qualities about these people you’ve attracted you can either work to eliminate the bad qualities in yourself that these people are mirror and; or you can work to even augment the good qualities that you see in yourself.
Remember that we are in control of our lives. We’re in control of how we behave, what our attitudes are like, what our thoughts reflect, and most of all what other people see in us. So use the reflection of others in your life to help you mould who you want to be. in fact this is a good way to create a checklist for yourself. Use this checklist in the daily weekly or monthly basis to see where you’ve come in your goals of improving certain qualities in your life. You may not have to develop qualities. You may just have to refine them and it’s a lot easier there already and you but you just have to make their manifestation better.
I write this from experience because it happened to me more than one time. Often a new person will come into my life and it’s a person that I’m not ecstatic exactly ecstatic with. When I write down a list of persons qualities and then I’m very honest with myself, I see myself as if I’m looking in a mirror. however this is been the most important time of my life because it gives me the opportunity to examine qualities that other people see in me, and change the things I want people to see. What’s funny is as soon as you adequately change or modify those qualities that person begins to fade from your life. If you look back over your life you can see how this is probably been the case with you if you’ve paid attention to what that person supposed to mean in your life.
Just as a reminder list 3 to 5 people in your life and write down the good qualities in the bad qualities you see in them. Take a deep look at yourself and determine if these are qualities that you have. If they are to choose to keep them what you want to change. Start working on yourself and then repeat the process and perhaps 3 to 6 months. See enough either that person is no longer in your life or perhaps that person is changed as well.
Terrie
The Power of Gratitude
Posted by: | Comments
My “Gratitudes” – this story is really important right now if you’re faltering either in your attempt to find out what your “Successes” are for 2012 or if you think you’ve made the correct list but are floundering around and not feeling very successful. Infusing your life and your goals with some gratitude may help get you back on track – IF you’ve followed the steps to creating your Success List.
I may have shared this before but it’s never too late to reiterate it since it was such a powerful moment in my life.
I have always been a big proponent of the power of gratitude but I don’t think I ever really applied it with a strong “need” before the spring/summer of 2004.
You see, I had just been “blessed” by getting a job offer in San Antonio – I was living in Virginia then.
Let me digress a bit and explain that part of the story. I was in the Navy and had been for almost 30 years. In 1985 I had been stationed in San Antonio and absolutely loved it. In fact, that was where I became exposed to New Thought. As I was transferred to the East Coast I declared “I’ll be back here” – my friends laughed at me because there weren’t any other Navy opportunities for me in San Antonio.
But, over the years I held on to that idea in the back of my head. In 2003-2004 I began to talk to my friends in Virginia about a non-profit organization that I want to start. They would ask where it was going to be – out of nowhere I replied “Texas” – I have no idea why I said that – usually those types of responses are the ones you must pay attention to.
Anyway, in the spring of 2004 I was at a conference and my boss forwarded me a notice of a job opening in Washington DC (where I was already working) doing the SAME job I was already doing and had been for 11 years. Of course, my interest was peaked. For once, fortunately, I scrolled down and you won’t believe what popped up right up in front of my eyes. There was the same job offer in SAN ANTONIO, Tx – right where I was stationed 20 years prior. Imagine my joy at this.
However, I never imagined I would get the job so I did a very sloppy job of filling out the application, hit send and forgot about it. Several weeks later I received a phone call and the conversation went something like this “Everyone here loves you, Terrie and the job is yours” – how’s that for an interview? The Universe was really working for me. Of course, I said ‘yes’!
So, I flew to San Antonio to try to find a house. I had two dogs and had certain things I wanted to have in my property – I’ll tell you about my “outside access” manifestation in another post. I had four days to find a house. I wasn’t being successful. My realtor was wonderful and she drove me around looking at this place and that place and on and on. Nothing was right. I can’t even remember the reasons they weren’t right but I was getting desperate because I had to return to Virginia and had to start getting ready for my retirement from the Navy and a move to San Antonio, Tx! But, things didn’t seem to be working.
Then I began to question whether or not I should do this, whether or not it was right for me, was I acting too impulsively, etc. I even went so far as to talk to my boss and tell him I wanted to withdraw my request for retirement. Fortunately he told me he didn’t think that was going to to be possible – however, that just increased my anxiety.
So, the next to last night I was to be there, I laid down on my friend’s couch and all these horrible things were going around in my mind. What to do?
Suddenly it came to me. I started to say my “gratitudes” – I remembered that gratitude was the most powerful “action” anyone could take. I told myself that I had nothing to lose so I started in my anxious state to just be grateful for simple things – things that were easy to come up with – my mother, my father, my life in the navy, my health etc. I said “I am grateful for…..” over and over until I fell asleep very calm and serene.
The next morning I woke up still calm and relaxed, I knew things were going to work out – and they did. I found the house of my desires that day. As soon as I walked in that door I knew that this house was meant for me. But more about that in another post.
The primary point here (other than the power of manifestations) is that being grateful and showing that gratitude to the universe brought me everything I needed and wanted at least 10 times over. It took away all the external anxiety and as a result, all the internal anxiety. It allowed a direct route to me from the Universe. It was like a laundry chute. The Universe poured all that good into the chute and once I had said my “gratitudes” I opened the door and put the laundry bin under that chute and all those wonderful, good things fell into my life.
So, next time you’re feeling anxious, try saying or writing your “gratitudes”. You can use the Gratitude Journal that I had made for this purpose. It really works and it means lot to be able to look back and see what it glorious things have happened to you..but the fun part is to also record the small things, the things that happen everyday – “I found a parking space up close to Target” for instance. “I didn’t hit one red light on the way to work this morning” – anything you’re grateful for – put it down.
Enjoy the power of gratitude!
Terrie
